Mari Musings

I'm so annoyed with the SD card I use for my 3DS. I corrupted the disk and lost all of my data. Embarrassingly, I haven't made a backup in over a year. >__> Which is my bad, obviously, but grrr — I don't understand why the card is failing already. I purchased it new when I modded my 3DS, which I don't play super regularly. There's something about file transfers that the card just doesn't like. All I did was delete a couple of badges and it borked itself. ^^; Yikes... I noticed it becomes hot to the touch during large file transfer, so I wonder if the heat is what's causing it to fail. As I started the recovery process, I ended up turning my little desk fan onto it. It seems to have helped the performance, but not enough to transfer files over 1GB. It might be time to replace the disk.

I started writing this entry yesterday and the card killed itself again, so I ended up buying a new one. I think the old one should still be under warranty so hopefully I can get that replaced. Wish me luck LOL!!!!!! The new card is functioning so much better. I notice that it still heats up when doing transfers, but the performance isn't impacted nearly as much. My original card borked itself within the first session of using it, so I think it must have been unreliable from the start. My fingers are crossed that I don't have issues anymore. It's a real pain having to re-install all of my homebrew apps every time.

Anyway, I finally finished this cute piece of Ashley. I might work on her OC page today, we'll see. ♥

I always want to blog more casually, but I have like a disease or something that forces me to take it way too seriously... ORZ Luckily, I think it can be cured with the power of friendship. I love reading my friend Toki's blog, and she encouraged me to just do it! So here I go...!

I'm been super depresso the past few months for a variety of reasons. Chiefly, working primarily from home has burnt me out. I'm an extroverted person, so being by myself all day, for several days in a row is draining. But I can't go back to work in the office because of the bullying culture. And the job market is fucked right now that I can't get another job that I can support my family with. >__> I just gotta stick with it for as long as I can. I really worry about my work performance getting me in trouble, though. I will continue to do my best and be social where I can.

ANYWAY, on a more positive note, I've been enjoying the Halloween spirit this year. TBH, I'm not a huge holiday person. I like Valentine's day because it feels low pressure to enjoy it because so many people seem to hate it. Halloween and Christmas are overwhelming. Luckily, Dudu likes to be festive and brought out the decorations. So now our house is spooky! ♥ We finished watching one of my favorite shows, Haunted Hotel! It's surprisingly good and wholesome for an adult western animation series. The second season came out the other day, and we binged it just over this weekend lol. I want to rewatch the Haunting of Hill House before Halloween, too. I love watching horror movies throughout the year, but now I have an excuse!

As far as TV habits go, Dudu and I are now on season 19 of Grey's Anatomy. Watching it is basically ritual torture, but I've come to a point in the show where I might as well see it through. It's like a weird for of stockholm syndrome where the show hasn't been good in like 10 seasons, but it's a special kind of experience seeing how characters grow over ~20 years in real time. That said, I'd like to rewatch House as a palette cleanser after we get caught up on Grey's. ...Or maybe I'll go back and watch the first 9 seasons again LOL!

I haven't played a wide variety of games lately, mainly due to excessive sleepiness. BUT! I've gotten sooo into Love and Deepspace the past few months. Maybe I will write something in depth at a later time. I'll just say that it's a fun game with shockingly well-written characters. My favs are Caleb and Zayne, but they are all good LADS, hehe. ♥ ❄️🍎

Ham-ha, readers! I have a lazy update, with nothing crazy to share. I’ve been fairly busy the past couple of months, but there’s not much to ‘write home about.’ I’ve felt disinterested from updating my site, hence the lack of updates. I’ve been working on some backend stuff, but writing very little…

I’ve been working on taking better care of myself the past few months, and it’s paying off. I started taking vitamins and eating better, more consistently. My efforts have brought me energy and a much easier time sleeping, definitely something to be grateful for. I don’t own a scale, but I think I’ve also lost a bit of weight too. The clothes that would not fit me at all last summer fit “normally” again. Overall, I feel a lot stronger and better overall physically, and I’m proud of myself.

I need my strength because work and family have brought unprecedented challenges to my life. The oldest daughter curse never goes away. And as for work, I just try to be grateful for what I have and how far I’ve come. I’m trying to just keep ahold of myself and stick to my values, as alluring as casual evil seems lately.

As far as my hobbies, I’ve been playing games and painting Warhammer mini’s the past couple months.

I started a new Baldur’s Gate 3 playthrough a couple months ago. This time, I just played a regular Tav. My character, Maeve, is a Lolth-sworn drow bard …aka playing as myself LOL. I get the sense that I might be the drama in this playthrough, and perhaps, a bit unintentionally evil. At one point Shadowheart, Astarion, and Lae’zel kept disapproving of my actions, feeling disgusted by my Tav's callous brutality. But I’m literally righteous. Screw my haters.

I also picked up Tomodachi life in April, and it’s been a blast. I’ve come to a lull with it where I only play here and there throughout the day. One of these days, I’ll gather up the motivation to make an in-depth post about my island. For now, I will just say that my island is a chaotic mix of my OCs, the Baldur’s Gate rapscallions, the Witcher, and assorted characters from Dudu and I’s interests. The most important highlight is that Dumbledore and Gandalf got married of their own volition, with very little interference from me.

I also just started a long-awaited replay of the Witcher 3. I’ve come a long way since I first played it in 2020, and I’m breezing through the open world. I appreciate the game even more now that I understand much more of the lore leading up to it, having read the novels. I’m hoping to actually finish the game this time, as well as play the DLC for the first time.

Finally, I’ve been helping Dudu paint his Warhammer army. Progress is slow, sadly. I want to rearrange our office and hobby area in a way that it will accommodate both of us painting at once. It’s cluttered and messy at the moment, and that drives me crazy!

That’s all there is to say for now. I’m hopeful that things will improve soon. Just gotta stay on the grind :’)

My diary entries have officially bled over into insufferable internet oversharing. I am constantly complaining about books I read in my diary, a safe place to do so by nature. I regularly crash out while reading Harper L. Woods books, which is a bit sad. Her writing is like eating Walmart sheet cake — it is no boutique cupcake yet still delicious.

I finally finished Of Flesh & Bones #3 after starting it 2 months ago. I had to take a break because What Lurks Between the Fates because it's so damn boring and frustrating. I'm considering dropping the series altogether after the piss ending of Fates. The plot is nowhere in sight; I have few answers promised in Shadows and teased throughout the book; the evil of the main villain is horribly contrived; and worst of all, I could hardly call it a romance.

I reread some key moments of the first book, and I remembered why I liked this series in the first place. Caelum is mysterious, caring, charismatic, and questions the status quo. It was pretty obvious from the start that he is the fae bound to Estrella by fate, but even in it's predictability, I loved the story. In Fates, Caelum—pigheaded and obnoxious as he is—hardly has any meaningful screentime. Seriously, even the chapters from his perspective add nothing to his character or the narrative. He's basically a Ken doll. The story of Fates is an unresolved power struggled between Queen Mab and Estrella, Caelum acting more as a speedbump through repetitive and painfully unsexy romance scenes.

And Queen Mab herself was an a compelling and likable villain at the start of the books. She is a misandrist legend who understands that men can only hold her back in a medieval, misogynistic world. But in killing her soulmate, she also destroyed half of her soul, sending her into madness. Her brutality and lust for power is a great foil for Estrella who embraces her power to oppose that same misogyny, escaping a sexist status quo. Instead of leaning into this similarity, Woods completely discredits Mab by making her (and her party) female rapists. Of course, being a rapist is unforgivable and completely undermines the relatability of her character. Woods effectively threw away any narrative tension that had been built up. It's so fucking annoying.

And as I was crashing out about this in my diary a couple months ago, I came to a moment of clarity. Like Girl — put the book down. So I did... and when I finally finished it, I was just as disappointed as I expected to be. UGH!

I love Woods writing style, the gore, and her willingness to 'go there.' Seriously, there was a moment in Shadows where Caelum and Estrella were afraid they were actually step siblings — which was hilarious and so awkward. Woods doesn't pull her punches, and I love that. But she doesn't know where her story is going. After I went back and reread some of Veil, I remembered how good it was, which makes the undelivered promise of Fates sting that much more. I want to know where the story is going, but there are FOUR more books in the series and counting. At the pace the story is going, I don't know if I'm willing to invest my time in a story that will ultimately just disappoint me. I'm tempted to read reviews, but I don't want to be spoiled.

I think at the very least, I will take a break from the series and come back when I can't handle the curiosity any longer.

On a related note, I'm always afraid when I write these venty reviews that the authors I complain about will stumble upon them one day. I hope that it is understood that my moaning and bellyaching comes from a place of love for the series. If I simply didn't care, I wouldn't bother.

Watching: Grey's Anatomy s7 — SLOWLY... Dudu is obsessed

Reading: you already know ha ha ha

Listening: Polly Von

Playing: Baldur's Gate 3